Defines, Bends, But'll Never Change;

Keep Faith In Faith;

In a Search For In Everything..." -BT, "animals".

I just recieved one of the most beautiful emails I've ever read. It made my thoughts curve around the fact that there are people who love me, and people whom I love. Life is a blink in the cycle of time, so why not entrench yourself in it as much as possible?

This entry isn't for the people who have already decided that I'm worth picking apart verbally. It's not a hostile exclusion to you all, but rather something where there's no room for you, plain and simple, although I may still care very much about you. In a sense, I am unaffected. Realistically, very much so. But it's the strength of people who are good for me that balances that, and at times, violently flings the scale in the positive direction so much that I could cry, like I did tonight.

This entry is for many of you people who read this diary already. I've been so fortunate to have so many amazing people in my life. As college wraps up, I've been making an effort to express the importance of some people's presences in my life. It's invaluable, and how could I take off to the other side of the world without a thank-you? A letter is a keepsake but it could never be a capsule of how I feel about you all, no matter how poetic I chose to be, no matter if I knew all of the words in the dictionary. That's limiting but beautiful. I would hope that certain emotions defy all description and deftly dodge any effort to link them to words. Sometimes, that's the best way. That's why there's poetry. But I'll never be good enough to express quite how I feel right now.

The fact that there's so many great people known to me is what soothes the wounds of barbed words. Lately, it seems there's been a lot of them. I cannot understand why some people would feel the need to poison someone else. Maybe it's a personal thing. I don't know. My skin isn't thick.

But if ever scarred, you good people move up close and soothe like healing and calmness. I should be so fortunate to have meet any of you. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't write, I wouldn't dream, and I suppose I wouldn't even get out of bed.

This has been longer than thought, but thank you so much, so very very much, for being. If you think you're a recipient of this entry, then smile and know that there's a boy steeped in dreams currently who thinks the world of you, even if he doesn't say it all of the time. You need to know. And you will. And to think - there's so many more people who have the privledge of meeting you as well...

circles in stars that bind us now,

Jared